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Newbie finding job not quite as expected. And a flying dog.

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pricklyball
Posts: 3
Joined: 14 Aug 2013, 20:55
Gender: Male

Newbie finding job not quite as expected. And a flying dog.

Post by pricklyball »

Hi all!
I'm a newbie postie and am finding the job isn't quite what i'd expected.
I've been a Postman Pat fan since I could first toddle, but the big wide world isn't like Greendale, and there's no Mrs. Goggins to console me.
I'm not saying I expected to be flying a helicopter and rescuing cows from mountainside's while delivering the mail, but I hoped I'd be met with a degree of friendliness.
I'm in a rural area, after all.
The other day i was chased for half a mile by an angry lady in a frilly nightgown - God knows why. I'd refused to let her 'empty my sacks', that's all. That would be completely against regulations.
Later, a farmer threw a dog at me.
Oh well: maybe things will improve. Tomorrow I plan a cheeky first try-on of my postie shorts. Wish me luck! :nana
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Pinky 1
Posts: 1510
Joined: 01 Mar 2009, 11:38
Gender: Male
Location: Wales

Re: Newbie finding job not quite as expected. And a flying d

Post by Pinky 1 »

pricklyball, you sound like a right head- case.
Welcome to the asylum :crazy:
"Cara yn bod 'n briod , dydy 'n fawr at ca a hun 'n anad berson a 'ch angen at blina achos 'r bwyso chan 'ch buchedd "
" I like being married,, it's great to find that one special person you want to bother for the rest of your life "
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db
MAIL CENTRES/PROCESSING
Posts: 190
Joined: 19 Mar 2010, 03:03
Gender: Male

Re: Newbie finding job not quite as expected. And a flying d

Post by db »

pricklyball wrote:Hi all!
I'm a newbie postie and am finding the job isn't quite what i'd expected.
I've been a Postman Pat fan since I could first toddle, but the big wide world isn't like Greendale, and there's no Mrs. Goggins to console me.
I'm not saying I expected to be flying a helicopter and rescuing cows from mountainside's while delivering the mail, but I hoped I'd be met with a degree of friendliness.
I'm in a rural area, after all.
The other day i was chased for half a mile by an angry lady in a frilly nightgown - God knows why. I'd refused to let her 'empty my sacks', that's all. That would be completely against regulations.
Later, a farmer threw a dog at me.
Oh well: maybe things will improve. Tomorrow I plan a cheeky first try-on of my postie shorts. Wish me luck! :nana
Stay off the weed
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llcoolh
Posts: 129
Joined: 05 Nov 2012, 08:58
Gender: Male

Re: Newbie finding job not quite as expected. And a flying d

Post by llcoolh »

The other day i was chased for half a mile by an angry lady in a frilly nightgown - God knows why. I'd refused to let her 'empty my sacks', that's all. That would be completely against regulations.

Haha, hope she didnt bite you...LOL. Welcome to RM mate :wave :thumbup
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pricklyball
Posts: 3
Joined: 14 Aug 2013, 20:55
Gender: Male

Re: Newbie finding job not quite as expected. And a flying d

Post by pricklyball »

Well, my knees are frozen. Should have waited to give the shorts their first outing, really, but I needed something to lift my spirits.
Had to deliver a parcel to the lady in the frilly nightgown – a ‘signed-for’, as luck would have it. Kept the van running and put my sunglasses on in the hope she wouldn’t recognise me, but no such luck. She leant coyly on the doorframe as she signed for the parcel and informed me that I was a ‘naughty boy’ but that she’d ‘decided to give me another chance.’ I backed away, informing her that unfortunately I would not be in a position to let her assist with the emptying of my sacks, but she was unwrapping her parcel and not listening. She produced what I can only describe as a tube of black rubber and held it up against herself, informing me she couldn’t wait to try it on, and asking if a big strong fellow like me could help with the zip.
Retreated to the van, which stalled. As I tried to restart it she was cackling and leering and banging on the window and affording me nightmare glimpses of what lay beneath the frilly nightgown. As I still had my sunglasses on, i closed my eyes and was too upset to open them for a bit, which meant I most unfortunately then ran over a stray sheep, incurring an unbelievable amount o paperwork.
On the plus side, managed to avoid having any dogs thrown at me today, but was bitten by a toddler: savage little bugger – snarled at me from a mask of Marmite and drool, and when I smiled in a friendly manner and asked “Is your Mummy in?” it lunged for my ankle. I retreated, shaking my leg, and managed to throw it off in a ditch by the gate, where it sat making threatening bubbling noises until I was safely locked in the van.

Not much of an improvement on yesterday, all in all.
Oh, well. Onward and upwards!
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clashcityrocker
Posts: 16469
Joined: 22 Sep 2009, 13:50
Gender: Male
Location: strummerville

Re: Newbie finding job not quite as expected. And a flying d

Post by clashcityrocker »

Kept the van running? :no no

You won't be a postie for much longer if you do silly things like that.
The societies of consumption and squandering of material resources are incompatible with the idea of economic growth and a clean planet.
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Pinky 1
Posts: 1510
Joined: 01 Mar 2009, 11:38
Gender: Male
Location: Wales

Re: Newbie finding job not quite as expected. And a flying d

Post by Pinky 1 »

Does pricklyball sound just like straight4ward, or is that just me ? :hmmmm
"Cara yn bod 'n briod , dydy 'n fawr at ca a hun 'n anad berson a 'ch angen at blina achos 'r bwyso chan 'ch buchedd "
" I like being married,, it's great to find that one special person you want to bother for the rest of your life "
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mandelsons_toenail
Posts: 1294
Joined: 08 Aug 2009, 18:16
Gender: Male
Location: Outer Hebrides

Re: Newbie finding job not quite as expected. And a flying d

Post by mandelsons_toenail »

This is made up right?

Either that or you are on some hard drugs
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DGP1
Posts: 15551
Joined: 07 Jun 2007, 20:39
Gender: Male
Location: Terminus

Re: Newbie finding job not quite as expected. And a flying d

Post by DGP1 »

Pinky 1 wrote:Does pricklyball sound just like straight4ward, or is that just me ? :hmmmm
Sounds more like L Tommo :nervous :chuckle :chuckle :chuckle :chuckle
I'm preparing myself for the zombie invasion, rule number 1 - Cardio
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pricklyball
Posts: 3
Joined: 14 Aug 2013, 20:55
Gender: Male

Re: Newbie finding job not quite as expected. And a flying d

Post by pricklyball »

Had a Disciplinary Hearing with the boss, today. Well: he didn’t call it a D.H, of course. He’s not that kind of guy. He called it a chat-ette, and it was all very relaxed, really. NBD. (That’s ‘no big deal, incidentally.)
Gave me a few guidelines re not running over sheep. And it turns out the toddler I left in a ditch wasn’t a toddler at all, but a person of restricted growth. Actually, he called it a Little Person, which left me hugely confused, and I told him: “Trust me – the little bastard wasn’t a pixie.”
Came home to find Mother having one of the meetings of her coven in the kitchen. Think I’ll go to the pub.
:confused
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clashcityrocker
Posts: 16469
Joined: 22 Sep 2009, 13:50
Gender: Male
Location: strummerville

Re: Newbie finding job not quite as expected. And a flying d

Post by clashcityrocker »

pricklyball wrote: Think I’ll go to the pub.
:confused
Will Julie be there?
The societies of consumption and squandering of material resources are incompatible with the idea of economic growth and a clean planet.
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Shambles
MAIL CENTRES/PROCESSING
Posts: 736
Joined: 25 Jul 2013, 21:30
Gender: Female
Location: Tree house

Re: Newbie finding job not quite as expected. And a flying d

Post by Shambles »

:crazy: what a nutta.....lol....love it... :left:
I have No Friends,
Or Enemies....
Only Teachers.
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