to all top union reps

[postman8]

my wife and i have recently after months of her being in pain have been told she will require a serious operation to cure it ,as a result she will be in hospital for a week and struggling for some time after.
we have a 5 year old and a 2 year old so i will need time off to look after my kids and my wife when she gets out of hospital.
my question is can i agree time off on grounds of a serious family problem fully paid at short notice because of this.
i do have 3 weeks paid leave to take this year which is booked but might be able to swap ,question is will the manager agree to this and what can i do if he refuses.
my only other option is to go sick this will with out a doubt take me over 14 days and result in a stage 1 warning but family comes first and if this is my only option so be it.

[SexyLegs]

my wife and i have recently after months of her being in pain have been told she will require a serious operation to cure it ,as a result she will be in hospital for a week and struggling for some time after.
we have a 5 year old and a 2 year old so i will need time off to look after my kids and my wife when she gets out of hospital.
my question is can i agree time off on grounds of a serious family problem fully paid at short notice because of this.
i do have 3 weeks paid leave to take this year which is booked but might be able to swap ,question is will the manager agree to this and what can i do if he refuses.
my only other option is to go sick this will with out a doubt take me over 14 days and result in a stage 1 warning but family comes first and if this is my only option so be it.

Domestic Distress is an option but it's unpaid and you only get 5 or so days per year!

Going sick will result in a Stage 1 but is it that bad?, as you say family comes first and you don't want to not be paid while you're attending to the boss!

How well do you get on with your DOM?, my experience is they're all c**** not to be trusted! You could talk to him!

Personally I'd go and see your Doc, tell him/her the wife's illness is stressing you out and you need some time off to sort her out and get your head right.

Good Luck

[Judgee]

Bloke in my office had to take a few months off to look after his wife who was treated for cancer. He got full pay for the time he was off but it very much is done at the discretion of the manager.

Legally I don't think they can stop you taking the time off but I don't think they have to pay you?

Best bet would be to talk to your local rep first and check out what your basic entitlements are. Then speak with your manager and hope he is sympathetic to your troubles.

Good luck with it all.

[wayoutman]

im with sexylegs, go to GP and explain your problem.

i would sooner approach the doc than the dom

[clashcityrocker]

Bloke in my office had to take a few months off to look after his wife who was treated for cancer. He got full pay for the time he was off but it very much is done at the discretion of the manager.

This would come under "indirect discrimination" I think as her condition would be covered under the Equality Act.
I don't think the manager had much room for discretion.

[postman8]

thanks guys all noted

[ronpetetrevchris]

Bloke in my office had to take a few months off to look after his wife who was treated for cancer. He got full pay for the time he was off but it very much is done at the discretion of the manager.

This would come under "indirect discrimination" I think as her condition would be covered under the Equality Act.
I don't think the manager had much room for discretion.

This situation has vome up a couple of times in our D.O and partners have never been given time off, area rep never said anything about indirect discrimination, have to bear that in mind next time. Ta.

[fishtank]

It's known as discrimination by association and was tested in European Law by the Coleman Vs Attridge Law case.

Coleman v Attridge Law
Association with a disabled person

Sharon Coleman worked as a legal secretary for Attridge Law Solicitors from January 2001. In 2002 she gave birth to a disabled child for whom she was the primary carer. In 2005 she accepted voluntary redundancy and brought a claim in the Employment Tribunal for constructive unfair dismissal and disability discrimination. She argued that she had been treated less favourably than other employees because she was the primary carer of a disabled child.

Ms Coleman argued at the tribunal that the European Commission Directive 2000/78, known as the equal treatment directive, had not properly been transposed into UK law in the form of the Disability Discrimination Act (DDA).

She claimed that the Directive allowed her to bring a claim for less favourable treatment and harassment because of her association with her disabled son. This is because the Directive prohibits discrimination on the grounds of religion or belief, disability, age or sexual orientation.

The employment tribunal referred her case to the European Court as this point needed to be decided before it could come to any of her allegations of less favourable treatment.

The European Court held that although the provisions relating to reasonable accommodation or adjustments in the workplace can relate only to disabled people, this does not mean that the provisions prohibiting direct discrimination and harassment must relate exclusively to disabled people.

Agreeing with Ms Coleman's argument the court held that ‘where it is established that an employee in a situation such as that in the present case suffers discrimination on the grounds of disability, an interpretation of Directive 2000/78 limiting its application only to people who are themselves disabled is liable to deprive that directive of an important element of its effectiveness and to reduce the protection which it is intended to guarantee".

Legal implications for employers

It has been possible to bring claims for associative discrimination against public sector organisations since the ECJ decision. The EAT subsequently decided that cases could also be brought against private sector employers like Attridge Law and claims for association with a disabled person can now be brought under the Equality Act 2010.

Employers who have good policies in place that are well implemented have little to fear from this development. There is no obligation on employers to make reasonable adjustments for non-disabled employees.

They must, however, ensure that they do not directly discriminate against or harass an employee on the grounds of disability e.g. because they care for a disabled person or have a partner who is HIV positive.

Mrs Coleman's case was settled out of court for an undisclosed sum in compensation.

[ronpetetrevchris]

Hmmmm i can see why the area rep perhaps didnt want to know, that would be his years budget gone

[brothermagrew]

http://www.bailii.org/eu/cases/EUECJ/2008/C30306_O.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[ndg1]

i believe if i am wrong someone will correct me , under new government regs you can have the same rights to look after your children as your wife / partner this is not just for new born.( unpaid) see your GP AND GO UNDER STRESS , which is covered under the DDA.

[ronpetetrevchris]

I now have a guy whos misses went through cancer, currently clear, but, now she is clear has had a bit of a breakdown, stress of the last two years. Her husband who works for us wants to look after her (obviously) but hes gotta take unpaid leave. Anyone help us on this point?

[ndg1]

I now have a guy whos misses went through cancer, currently clear, but, now she is clear has had a bit of a breakdown, stress of the last two years. Her husband who works for us wants to look after her (obviously) but hes gotta take unpaid leave. Anyone help us on this point?

is their any childcare issues , you can always ask to take a sabbatical. this can be taken up to 1- 3 years. (unpaid)

[clashcityrocker]

I now have a guy whos misses went through cancer, currently clear, but, now she is clear has had a bit of a breakdown, stress of the last two years. Her husband who works for us wants to look after her (obviously) but hes gotta take unpaid leave. Anyone help us on this point?

See Fishtank's post above on discrimination by association.
You can't ever be clear of cancer - once diagnosed with cancer you are covered under the Equality Act.
If the stress is related to the cancer, it should also be covered by the Equality Act.
Is the GP sympathetic? Would he write a letter to that effect?

[IcanthelpthewayIam]

i believe if i am wrong someone will correct me , under new government regs you can have the same rights to look after your children as your wife / partner this is not just for new born.( unpaid) see your GP AND GO UNDER STRESS , which is covered under the DDA.

so your recommending that he pretends he has stress to get extra time off?

and people wonder why DOMs doubt the genuinety of their illness, its because of advice like this telling someone to make up a serious illness that he does not have unless you have some crystal ball that can read the mind of the original poster